Finding Holiday Comforts in the Stillness

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The three of us, my mom, Donnie, and I, pulled on winter coats and slid into my mom’s car, driving around neighborhoods sparkling with elaborate light displays.

Protected from the Michigan weather by a car heater and my mom’s favorite Anne Murray Christmas cassette, we could chat, debate the merits of multi-colored versus all-white lights, or ride in silence, hundreds of tiny lights breaking the early darkness of winter nights.

At home, our Christmas tree lights reflected off the gold garland always strung in looping circles around the trees we chose as a family, early in the day to accommodate my dad’s afternoon work shift.  I curled on the couch, legs under me and a book on my lap, reading by the lowest possible light to maximize the magic of the hundreds of colored lights.

More than a small Whitman’s sampler tucked into my stocking or my beloved Brother typewriter or the triangular bottle of 273 Rodeo Drive by Fred Hayman perfume I desperately wanted, the moments I return to when planning ways to create memorable holidays for our kids are the ones removed from the gift giving. 

Car rides along Jefferson Avenue to watch the stillness of Christmas lights reflecting on the water, late nights sitting near a lit tree, and Christmas day spent curled up with a new book, pajamas worn long past morning, all conjure the peace and comfort that make the holidays my favorite time of year.

browsing her favorite doll catalog

Toy catalogs are peppering our mailbox, and we’ve already spoken at length about the various decorated trees in Lord & Taylor; soon the holiday season will be in full swing.  With two young children, there’s not a great way to escape the insanity of toy store shopping or visiting Santa at the mall, and truthfully, that hectic energy is its own sort of holiday magic.

Yet, the moments I look forward to the most are the still ones.  Abbey and Dylan easing into new Christmas jammies after celebrating Christmas Eve at my parents’ house.   Seeing our stockings hanging along the mantle.  The blissful moment Ryan and I can finally sink into bed after spending too much time doing Santa’s grunt work with a few tools and too many parts making up a dollhouse.

For Abbey’s sake, this January and February I forgave the people who left their holiday lights up far too long, because we could still drive past and marvel at the sparkling colors, the kids snuggled into cozy car seats, adults enjoying the warmth of heated seats and holiday music on the radio.

Shopping lists and wrapping gifts and snowflake crafts are already bouncing around in my head, and I relish creating holiday magic for my family.  But the moments of stillness and joy are the memories I cherish; long after our ornaments have been packed into their boxes, I carry those moments of holiday comfort with me into the unknown adventures of the New Year.

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Does a Smile Fit in an Envelope?

If you walk into my mom’s house, you are likely to find a few of the same things scattered in their usual spots.

Diet pop (or soda, if you please) in the crisper drawer, the book she’s currently reading on one of the family room end tables, and an addressed card or two propped up on the kitchen counter, waiting to go in the mail.

Lots of people send birthday cards, but my mom remembers anniversaries and new babies, weddings and new jobs, and sometimes just a card to say hello.

For a while, I took pride in having a stockpile of cards on hand for any occasion.  I flipped through my address book and sealed with little stickers and dropped them in the mail.  Then our budget tightened, my supply began to dwindle, and I found myself in front of card displays before holidays, mentally choosing the cards I would send.

Hallmark, of course, is the king of cards.  Wandering through their aisles, you see cards for big occasions and cards for small moments.  They have cards with words you wish you’d thought of and cards beautifully blank inside for you to fill with your own.

And thanks to Hallmark, I had the chance to channel my mom for a week.

Hallmark provided me with a packet of cards and stamps, though some of their cards now come with the postage already paid.  Their premise was simple: send a card a day for seven days.

Once again, I settled into my couch, legs underneath me, and opened my address book.

I sent cards that made me smile, signing my name and sealing the envelope with a flourish.  I wrote a note to a friend coming up to a bittersweet milestone with her child and sent away a smile to a blogging friend who makes me feel special every day.  I wrote to my grandma, who we already miss like crazy, and my best friend, and a friend I haven’t seen in far too long.

I received texts and e-mails and phone calls in return; like me, people like getting something besides bills in the mail.  Those little thank you messages made me smile, completing the circle, a hug through the miles that started with a card in the mail.

I also received silence, and I understand that, too.  To-do lists get long, and time slips into nighttime, and phone calls get postponed yet again. 

Still, watching those smooth envelopes slide into the blue mailbox each day, I was reminded of the beauty of a written note, a tangible thought, able to be tucked into a book or a car visor for a later moment. 

I may have to go out for a few more stamps.

their version of a greeting card

Hallmark provided me with a set of cards and postage to cover their mailing, but no further compensation was provided for this post.  All experiences and opinions expressed are my own and were not influenced by Hallmark in any way.