Somehow, I had made it through the ultrasound without caving and begging the technician to tell us the sex of our healthy baby. After finding out with Abbey, Ryan and I had agreed that this baby would be a surprise.
But now, coloring at the table with my relatively calm daughter, I worried.
I was scared to have a boy.
I wanted a son. A little guy to look up to Ryan and wear preppy clothes and tattered baseball caps. A grown man to dance with as a mother of the groom.
Still, I was scared to have a boy.
My own childhood was filled with dance classes and days spent at the library devouring books and playing school in my room next to my canopy bed. I loved skirts that twirled in circles. I didn't like bugs or dirt.
What would I do with a boy?
Of course, I fell in love with him the moment I met him.
There's nothing sweeter than the ten times a day he stops what he's doing to come hug me and bestow one or two or seven slobbery kisses on me before returning to wreck havoc on the house.
Little plaid shirts and sweater vests and khaki shorts catch my eye nearly as much as tulle skirts and hand-crafted headbands.
Still, he proves daily that my fears weren't unfounded. He presses every button within reach and loads the DVD player with any CD or DVD he manages to find around the house. We've strategically positioned three gates and could use at least one more. Our chosen cupboard locks stop him for approximately eight seconds when he decides to open them. He gleefully runs anywhere he shouldn't and has an inner device that leads him to drinking fountains and doors he can open himself.
I worry when I take him places, because he's notoriously unpredictable and not quiet about his preferences.
Waiting for Abbey's recital to start, he climbed up and down and up and down the wide steps of the auditorium. Ryan and my dad were on alert that they would likely spend the majority of the show in the hall with Dylan. Trying to get him to sit on my lap when the lights dimmed elicited his loudest vocal protests, and even his beloved Cheerios did little to distract him from the thought of climbing those stairs again.
Then the music started, the lights shone on the dancers, throwing rainbows off their sequined costumes, and he leaned against me, mesmerized. Later, as Ryan held him, snack cup still clenched in one hand, I was amazed. He craned his head to get a better view. He spontaneously clapped during performances. He didn't have to leave the theater until he went home at intermission.
Maybe boys aren't so scary after all.
not scared of Colleen's play structure at all
My first was a surprise and when they told me he was a boy, I had that same since of panic... on some level, I'd known he was a boy, but I had a sister and I played Barbies and what was I going to do with this BOY... we managed and, of course, I wouldn't have it any other way!
ReplyDeleteI was petrified when I found out I was having a boy. I am so glad I did though.
ReplyDeleteDylan is so cute! I love the pictures!
I have two girls and a boy. I will never forget the day my son decided he wasn't going to stay in bed while his big sisters watched a movie. He got up and climbed the gate across his bedroom door. I took him back to bed and stacked two gates across his bedroom door, one on top of the other. He climbed them both. I found little Spiderman, clinging to the inside of the second gate, little toes suspended three feet in the air, one leg going over the top, big, determined grin on his face. Since then, he has determined that he will ALWAYS keep up with his sisters, who are quite a bit older. He thinks he can stay up as late as they do; thinks he can watch the movies they watch; heck, he'll probably ask me for the car keys tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteI love having boy! My son is as busy and almost as clever as yours. JDaniel takes 10 seconds to open cabinets.
ReplyDeleteOOOOH, could have written it really! Oh Ang, I loved this. I used to say "there won't be cute clothes or lovely dresses or cute shoes" but wow, there really is. And everything I love about men, I can bring up my boys to be. Sure they rought and tumble, they fight and yell, they hit and don't sit still for a moment, but they are my heart. They love me and look at me like I am the PRINCESS of the house and our their lives and I revel in that.
ReplyDeleteYour son is sooooooo cute, so adorable, the perfect gift to your life with Abbey and Ryan. WOW. :)
xo
I know just how you felt - it's scary, the idea of having to raise someone so different from you!
ReplyDeleteYour son is adorable! I have an older daughter too and it is all true - raising boys and girls is so different. Their personalities could not be more opposing.
ReplyDelete(stopping by from PYHO)
I really, really thought I wanted a girl first. I kept telling everyone to think pink. So of course at 15 weeks and 6 days - I found out we were having a boy! I was scared just like you were. Now that he is almost six months old - I couldn't imagine not having my little boy. He is already all boy and gets hyper and destructive. I love every second of it too!
ReplyDeleteWe have one of each and feel blessed. I to wasn't sure I'd know what to do with a little boy however it just seems you know as a mama.
ReplyDeleteBoys are the best!!! And Yours is precious! :)
ReplyDeleteI do love my boy so very much, troublemaker or not!
ReplyDeleteI'm still not sure I know what I'm doing. Sometimes Abbey puts bows on him, and I take pictures of it :)
ReplyDeleteIsn't it funny how you think you want one or the other, and then when your baby comes, s/he is perfect just the way they are!
ReplyDeleteI feel terribly stereotypical saying that, but it (so far) has absolutely been my experience, and it seems like I'm not alone in that!
ReplyDeleteYes! That's it - I was just not prepared for "boy stuff", though I try very hard to make sure Abbey isn't only exposed to "girl stuff".
ReplyDeleteSo so true that you get to be the princess if you're the only girl :) I read one time that girls are easier as little ones but so much harder as teenagers. Maybe true, maybe not, but I was just as scared as having two teenage girls as I was of having a little crazy guy :) D is perfect in our family, just like G & J are perfect for you and John!
ReplyDeleteI can't let Dylan see this! He'll see the 10 seconds as a challenge and try to get his time down :)
ReplyDeleteFunny. I was terrified to have a girl. He's so adorable!
ReplyDeleteOK, that there is one heck of an adorable little guy! And my experience was backwards: I had the boy first, worried what I'd do with the girl!
ReplyDeleteOh, what a cutie pie! Boys are... well... boys. :) But, we love 'em like crazy!
ReplyDeleteThis will be my mantra as we (eek) camp this weekend and he keeps eating unknown substances from the ground...
ReplyDeleteI sometimes think you get panicked to have the opposite, no matter which one you have first. It's tough enough to figure out what to do with the first one, then you find your rhythm, and you worry how to parent outside of that comfort zone!
ReplyDeleteThanks! I'm terrified to have a pre-teen/teenage girl, ha ha :)
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