This Page

has been moved to new address

Neanderthal Not Included

Sorry for inconvenience...

Redirection provided by Blogger to WordPress Migration Service
/* global ----------------------------------------------- */ body { margin: 0; padding: 0; text-align: center; min-width: 760px; background: #ce436e url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_body.gif) repeat-x left top; font-family: helvetica, arial, verdana, "trebuchet ms", sans-serif; color: #632035; } blockquote { margin: 0; padding: 0 10px 0 10px; border-left: 6px solid #f7d8e2; border-right: 6px solid #f7d8e2; color: #ba476b; } code { color: #ba8094; } hr { display: none; } /* layout ----------------------------------------------- */ @media all { #wrapper { margin: 0 auto; width: 760px; text-align: left; } #blog-header { padding-bottom: 15px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_header_bottom.gif) no-repeat left bottom; } #blog-header div { background: #632035 url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_header.gif) repeat-x left bottom; } #main-wrapper { position: relative; width: 760px; background: #f7f0e9 url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_main_wrapper.gif) repeat-y left top; } #main-content { display: inline; /* fixes a strange ie margin bug */ float: left; margin: 0 0 0 3px; padding: 0; width: 483px; } #content-wrapper { padding: 22px 0 0 0; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_content.gif) repeat-x left top; } } @media handheld { #wrapper { width: 90%; } #blog-header { background:none; } #blog-header div { background: #632035; } #main-wrapper { width: 100%; background: #f7f0e9; } #main-content { float: none; width: 100%; } #content-wrapper { background: none; } } .post { margin: 0 16px 14px 29px; padding: 0; border-bottom: 3px solid #f7d8e2; } #comments { margin: 0 16px 14px 29px; padding: 10px; border: 1px solid #f0ced8; background-color: #f5e4e9; } @media all { #sidebar-wrapper { display: inline; /* fixes a strange ie margin bug */ float: right; margin: 0 3px 0 0; width: 269px; color: #761c37; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_sidebar.gif) repeat-x left top; } #sidebar { padding: 7px 11px 0 14px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_sidebar_arrow.gif) repeat-y 179px 0; } #blog-footer { padding-top: 15px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_footer_top.gif) no-repeat left top; } #blog-footer div { background: #491525 url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_footer.gif) repeat-x left top; } } @media handheld { #sidebar-wrapper { float: none; width: 100%; background:none; } #sidebar { background:none; } #blog-footer { background:none; } #blog-footer div { background: #491525; } } #profile-container { margin-bottom: 20px; } #blog-footer { padding-top: 15px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_footer_top.gif) no-repeat left top; } #blog-footer div { background: #491525 url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_footer.gif) repeat-x left top; } /* headings ----------------------------------------------- */ #blog-header h1 { margin: 0; padding: 26px 0 0 84px; color: #feeef3; font-size: 30px; line-height: 25px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_header.gif) no-repeat 16px 26px; } h2.date-header { margin: 0; padding: 0 0 0 29px; font-size: 10px; text-transform: uppercase; color: #c88fa2; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_date.gif) no-repeat 13px 0; } .date-header span { margin: 0 0 0 5px; padding: 0 25px 0 25px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/bg_date.gif) no-repeat 0 0; } h2.sidebar-title { padding: 1px 0 0 36px; font-size: 14px; color: #bd8095; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_sidebar_heading.gif) no-repeat 0 45%; } #profile-container h2.sidebar-title { color: #95526a; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_sidebar_profileheading.gif) no-repeat 0 45%; } .post h3.post-title { margin: 13px 0 0 0; padding: 0; font-size: 18px; color: #ba476b; } #comments h4 { margin-top: 0; font-size: 16px; } /* text ----------------------------------------------- */ #blog-header p { margin: 0; padding: 7px 16px 0 84px; color: #feeef3; font-size: 10px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 14px; } .post-body div { font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; margin: 0; height:1%; overflow:visible; } .post-body blockquote { margin: 10px 0px; } p.post-footer { font-size: 11px; color: #bd8095; text-align: right; } p.post-footer em { display: block; float: left; text-align: left; font-style: normal; } p.comment-data { font-size: 12px; } .comment-body p { font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px; } .deleted-comment { font-style:italic; color:gray; } .paging-control-container { float: right; margin: 0px 6px 0px 0px; font-size: 80%; } .unneeded-paging-control { visibility: hidden; } #sidebar p { font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 20px; } #sidebar p.profile-textblock { clear: both; margin-bottom: 10px; } .profile-link { padding: 0 0 0 17px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_profile.gif) no-repeat 0 0; } p#powered-by { margin: 0; padding: 0; } #blog-footer p { margin: 0; padding: 0 0 15px 55px; color: #feeef3; font-size: 10px; line-height: 14px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_footer.gif) no-repeat 16px 0; } /* lists ----------------------------------------------- */ .profile-data { font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; } .post ul { padding-left: 32px; list-style-type: none; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; } .post li { padding: 0 0 4px 17px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_list_item.gif) no-repeat 0 3px; } #comments ul { margin: 0; padding: 0; list-style-type: none; } #comments li { padding: 0 0 1px 17px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_comment.gif) no-repeat 0 3px; } #sidebar ul { margin: 0 0 20px 0; padding: 0; list-style-type: none; font-size: 12px; line-height: 14px; } #sidebar li { padding: 0 0 4px 17px; background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_list_item.gif) no-repeat 0 3px; } /* links ----------------------------------------------- */ a { color: #bf277e; font-weight: bold; } a:hover { color: #96095a; } a.comment-link { /* ie5.0/win doesn't apply padding to inline elements, so we hide these two declarations from it */ background/* */:/**/url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_comment.gif) no-repeat 0 45%; padding-left: 14px; } html>body a.comment-link { /* respecified, for ie5/mac's benefit */ background: url(http://www.blogblog.com/thisaway_rose/icon_comment.gif) no-repeat 0 45%; padding-left: 14px; } #sidebar ul a { color: #e25984; } #sidebar ul a:hover { color: #b02c56; } #powered-by a img { border: none; } #blog-header h1 a { color: #feeef3; text-decoration: none; } #blog-header h1 a:hover { color: #d9b4c1; } h3.post-title a { color: #ba476b; text-decoration: none; } h3.post-title a:hover { color: #902245; } /* miscellaneous ----------------------------------------------- */ .post-photo { padding: 3px; border: 1px solid #ebbdcc; } .profile-img { display: inline; } .profile-img img { float: left; margin: 0 10px 5px 0; padding: 3px; border: 1px solid #ebbdcc; } .profile-data strong { display: block; } .clear { clear: both; line-height: 0; height: 0; } /* Feeds ----------------------------------------------- */ #blogfeeds { font-size: 14px; } #postfeeds { font-size: 12px; }

Tiaras and Trucks

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Neanderthal Not Included

Furnish Your Man Cave* Today!

iPhone 4 - $300

     Black, less than one-month old, near new condition

     Item will be available for pick-up after text messages and inappropriate photos
     are downloaded to establish a pattern of lying, misdirection, poor taste, and
     less-than-stellar fitness habits.

La-Z-Boy Recliner – FREE!

     Faded mocha-colored microfiber, used

     Perfect for use in a garage or a basement, especially for a pet. Previously used
     by an oversized dog, figuratively speaking.

Neon Signs (Pabst Blue Ribbon, Coors Light, and Budweiser) - $150 each or $350 for set

     Bright, somewhat tacky, near new condition

     Ideal gift for someone living in a dorm room, fraternity house, or an alternate
     reality where life resembles a Will Ferrell movie.

Poker Table - $150

     Seats eight with cheap beer cup holders, green felt, professional quality, gently
     used

     Regular poker players – do you have a poker-playing friend who never seems to
     lose?
     Purchase this table and deliver it to his or her home! I can attest that the
     owner of this table will lose his/her money quickly and consistently, no matter
     the skill or intoxication level of the other players at the table.


Price on all items negotiable

Photos available upon request

*Neanderthal not included

This fictional post is brought to you by the weekly writing prompt at the awesomeness that is The Red Dress Club.  It was inspired by my general annoyance at the insipid whinings of the husbands on HGTV who need a "man cave" more than something like an updated kitchen or a front door.


Labels:

posted by angela @ 9:25 PM  

15 Comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home